Offense a toxin to the self-image
I must say that, since I have been on an extended water fast, at which time I am at day 11, I can relate a lot of things with the detox process in relation to the self-image. Every inch of my body is wreaking with detoxification through all my cells and organs, making me all the more aware of the need for a detoxification in my soul.
Recently, I reacted to someone’s conversation towards me, being more touchy than I realized, and became offended. As a result, my comments to them were not lovely to say the least. I was not myself but rather thin skinned, feeling like crud in the detox process of the fast. All I wanted to do was sleep because I had little strength. Needless to say I found out that it was definitely not the place or time in that moment to be in a conversation that might lead me down a road of offense.
Offense means, “annoyance or resentment brought about by a PERCEIVED insult to or disregard for oneself or one’s standard or principles; the action of attacking someone or something.” This comes from the Latin word offensus meaning annoyance, as well as the Latin word offensa meaning a striking against, a hurt or displeasure. In time, the word in Old French evolved into the word offens meaning misdeed.
Thus, offense is a strike against our self-image hurting us in regard to who we think we are. Here, we have displeasure, not seeing ourselves as we should. If you need a test of whether or not you have a good self-image, wait for the moment when a circumstance is in place where there is opportunity for an offense and see how you feel.
Generally, I am more able to process things and not be so reactive to peoples’ comments or conversations with me, but with this fast and feeling horrible I’m easily given over to my carnal nature manifesting the issue of offense that is deep down within my soul.
The soul is comprised of the heart and the mind, where we think and feel. The poor self-image is guiding us, without our knowledge, when we give ourselves over to our past thoughts and emotions, which predict our future, creating the same repetitive patterns, where we then find ourselves continually frustrated.
Our soul is our self-image. It is the self-image that is continually being transformed, as we go from glory to glory. (2 Corinthians 3:18) This place of our self-image is the means by which we PERCEIVE THINGS. Perceive means, “to become aware or conscious of something; come to realize or understand. Interpret or look on someone or something in a particular way.” This comes from two Latin words per meaning entirely and capere meaning take. The two Latin words combine to form the word precipere, which means seize and understand.
Therefore, when we perceive things it is our brain taking in the moment through our past memories, to associate as closely as possible, the definition of the present moment. This is why it is important to be set free from the old mindset and have the transformed mind, the Mind of Christ.
At 2 AM this morning God woke me up and said to me “Robin, love is not easily offended.” Immediately my heart was pierced as I realized that I had been offended with the Lady with whom I was in conversation. I cannot say for certain that I know her true intentions, but from what I perceived, whether it be real or not, I felt they were not good. Many times we can mistake other people’s intentions and put our own meaning on them.
However, even if the other person has bad intentions it is irrelevant when it comes to our self-image. No one can take away who you are. It is this blow we ache with, identifying who we are, which causes us to be self-defensive when we feel as though we are wronged.
Similar to my body detoxing from all the stored up garbage that has been there for decades, being cleaned out like a filthy garage, toxin is being cleaned out of my soul. These are things that have been stored up, keeping me from perceiving a new reality of a greater grace and provision for my soul, to reach a higher dimension of a better version of me.
I can tell you that had someone warned me about doing a water fast and the detox process, I most likely would have never started. However, I am committed now. I felt flu-like symptoms all over for several days and when my lower intestines were detoxing there was excruciating back pain that took me down.
But having said that, I will say that when I see the benefits that result from me doing a water fast, such as by day 15 all of my organs will be healed and then begins tissue repair, and eventually my eyes will have better vision, totally gets me pumped up. And the best thing of all is my relationship with God getting richer and deeper.
If I were to be totally honest I can tell you that I have cried out to God saying this is not what I signed up for, that the misery of it was nearly unbearable and I did not won’t to continue on the fast. Then after listening to my moaning, God gave me strength for one more day.
Each day I am seeing the detox of my soul, where the thing that had been hindering me in a measure had been offense deep within the recesses of my own heart. Sometimes we can be right but still be wrong, when we are doing things from the motive of offense.
It is all about the self-image. When you are not offended it is because you know WHO YOU ARE IN CHRIST JESUS!
This is what really got me with this particular message. God told me to look at Jesus on the Cross and then spoke quietly in a still small voice saying, “Robin, while Jesus was on the cross and all the insults were hurled towards Him, He was not offended.”
This totally blew my mind because I never thought of it like that. God went on and spoke in my heart, “Jesus knew Who He was, the Son of God, and nothing that anyone said, could change the image of Who He is.”
Man did that tilt my brain! I got it! Eureka! When we know who we are, our self-image, then we are unoffendable, because nothing can change the substance of our soul. What a message. No longer being self-defensive but walking in the truth of LOVE!
4 Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.
5 It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, forit is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
6 It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.
7 Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].
8 Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]. As for prophecy (the gift of interpreting the divine will and purpose), it will be fulfilled and pass away; as for tongues, they will be destroyed and cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away [it will lose its value and be superseded by truth]. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 AMPC