Respect and relationships
Relationships are a huge part of our lives. It gives us spiritual, physical, mental and emotional growth through the exchange of thoughts and emotions with those whom we are willing to risk some form of engagement. Engagement is the action of being engaged, which means “to participate and be involved in.”
Most of our hangups mentally and emotionally are due to the insecurities in our self-image, causing us to feel we are lacking or not whole. These issues restrain us from moving forward in taking risks of whether or not others will see the value in what we have, hoping that somehow we are validated in their eyes with the opportunity to have a connection of some kind, which will cause us to grow into a better version of ourselves.
The word engage originally started as the Middle English word ingage, meaning “to pawn or pledge something.” Later this word changed to mean “to pledge oneself to do something, enter into a contract, and in time to involve oneself in an activity.”
To pawn something is a way of saying, someone is putting collateral into some form of exchange with another person. Therefore, when we see engage there is an exchange on both parties to put something into the relationship, to bring something to the table. The table is our self-image. Therefore, each person is bringing something into a relationship to better the other person’s and their own self-image.
What is interesting is when I saw the Middle English word “ingage,” I could not help but think “ng” was changed to an “m” it would “image.” Our relationships with others is an engagement of the voice of our own self- image, which we bring to serve and help others.
In the present age, you see such a quagmire with relationships; they are treated like flavors of ice-cream, where people find it easy to dismiss one flavor for another one. As a result an entire generation is left in a chasm of inept coaching, unchallenged with their lack of self-esteem due largely to the fact that they have anemic relationships.
We have made it easy to provide excuses of cutting people off if they displease us, and moving to the next person that can satisfy us by making us feel qualified. This leaves a false sense of identity, whereby the self-image creates a facade, there is no true life flow in the blood of our relationships with others.
We lack respect for others because we do not respect ourselves.
Respect is “a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something, elicited by their abilities, qualities or achievements.” The word respect comes from two Latin words re meaning, “back,” and specere meaning, “to look at.” Thus, respect is being able to see another person’s reflection, the reflection of their value.
This is the thing though, you can only value others as you value yourself. It all begins with who we see in the mirror. When we come to know our value. we appreciate and feel secure in our different relationships, realizing that each person brings something different to the table. We appreciate these differences, not feeling threatened in any way, and enjoy the delight of a unique grace given to us, to be a part of another’s life, adding value to w better version of someone else’s self image.
Respect comes into our relationships as evidence of our own self-image, where there is security in who we are, and the value of others. This is the place of RE-SPECT.
Re-Spect stands for the Latin word “re” back, and spect being short for “spectacles.” Get this!!!! Spectacles is derived from the same Latin word for “look,” SPECERE! Spectacle means, “a visually striking performance or display; an event or scene regarded in terms of its visual impact.”
Therefore, respect is seeing with a new vision, as you get the lenses of a new set of spectacles that causes you to see everyone and everything differently, where you impact the lives of others because you impact yourself, allowing the exchange of the value within.
29 Jesus answered, The first and principal one of all commands is: Hear, O Israel, The Lord our God is one Lord;
30 And you shall love the Lord your God out of and with your whole heart and out of and with all your soul (your life) and out of and with all your mind (with your faculty of thought and your moral understanding) and out of and with all your strength. This is the first and principal commandment.
31 The second is like it and is this, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these. Mark 12:29-31 AMPC
This month clean out your bedroom, as a metaphor of the cleaning out of your minds of wrongful thoughts that have disempowered you in your relationships.