It is ok to grieve.
Saints, it is alright to be sad. There are times that our soul is grieved for one reason or another. Many times, it comes with the loss of loved ones or a lost relationship. Many in life see these circumstances as an approved moment of grief. However, there is one grief that goes unnoticed and leaves one perplexed, confused, and in a wrestling match. This is what the Lord wants me to touch on today.
I woke up this morning with thoughts running through my mind of how I went through such an insane hormonal imbalance, unaware that my estrogen deficiency had affected me, clueless to the fact that I was having mood swings. Moreover, that a mental health approach in treating some cases of schizophrenia is through estrogen replacement; some of those mental health cases are due to low estrogen.
Having received help and getting back to normal in my thought life, I am aware at times of my mood swings in the past and thank God for those of you on my Facebook wall, who knew the real me and were in prayer, as well as reached out. And to be honest, I thank God for those who have stayed on my wall, realizing that I lost some friends during this time. And that is ok.
The grief I found myself wrestling with this morning, is that others thought poorly of me, and instead of reaching out to see what was going on, just had judgmental opinions about me. Having worked with women who are even on disability because of the debilitating state, estrogen deficiency left them in, and the medical community missing it, they were overlooked has given me a passion to help. As a result, I can work more effectively in getting them proper medical treatment with the right doctors. Moreover, I'm more compassionate and empathetic having dealt with it myself.
At any rate, the devil was messing with me this morning, after all the repentance I did with individuals, who still chose to see me negatively. What saddened me is that I've been there when they were going through things, not thinking poorly of them and just loving them, praying with them. At any rate, the enemy doesn't want me to talk about this, and wants me to keep my mouth shut so women don't get the help they need, or go through grief in an effective way, to get to the end of it.
First of all, it is alright to grieve over this, because of a form of you that wasn't real, made its way into the mind of others, who couldn't see the real you. It is alright to be sad and express it without the thought of repercussion in being isolated, because they don't want you to talk about it, or should I say the devil doesn't want you to be real.
It is alright to express your grief, and move through the process by accepting it, and realizing that you had a momentary challenge in life because your hormones were whacked. This is an underserved and overlooked area, and truly needs to be dealt with in a compassionate manner, as any sickness.
This process was like waking up from a bad dream, realizing that things changed in your life. The changes are ok, and God is in them.
Next, in that acceptance, it is alright to live life, and believe the best about yourself, seeing yourself only through the eyes of Christ. As I was saddened about this, I had a talk with my husband, nursing him back to health while he was sick, and all Rich could do, was hold my hand and assure me of how giving, loving, compassionate, and merciful I am with others.
Lately, our neighbor, has gotten another dog, with the previous one she's had for years. As a result, the two dogs have barked all day long this week, while she's been at work. Finally, I had to call to get assistance so that it could be dealt with, and I could have peace. Thank goodness, she came home at lunch today and crated them, and now there's total peace. This is such a great analogy in relation to what this looks like with women in this process. The hormonal imbalance and mood swings are the constant barking of the enemy in your ear, making you feel like a bad person. Then, God brings peace! The dogs stop barking, and all is silent. In that silence, the grief surfaces, and comes out! Thanks be to God in Christ Jesus! Let the grief surface and come out! have your joy renewed in God's love!
Women, if you have gone through this, the Lord wants you to be at peace, and feel accepted in the Beloved, knowing that God will bring you peace, and in those moments, you feel uncertain of who you are, to know that God sees you and loves you!
God bless!
And God’s peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7 AMPC